Monday, May 4, 2009

Pigs Suck.

I get a sore throat!

Never one to miss an opportunity for rampant paranoia, I immediately assume it's the Dread Swine Flu. And hey, CDC, changing the name after the public hysteria has already broken out doesn't make it better.

"You'd better not have given me the Dread Swine Flu," I say accusingly to the DNB. Every horrible sickness I've had in the last eight years is unquestionably his fault. I feel like he should be more sorry for it all, frankly.

"Okay," he replies, gamely. "Oh, by the way, I love you," he adds.

I nod slowly. "We only give Swine Flu to the ones we love..."

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