Friday, October 31, 2008

In honor of Halloween, something scary.

I review political candidate information!

"Oh. My. Lord." I summon the DNB. "Check out THIS guy."

It's the bio of Minnesota State Representative candidate Adam J. Martin. It's on our paper's website, and includes a section called "Background." This is where all of the other candidates have included information about their relevant experience: past political positions, leadership activities, and community involvement. Not Adam J. His qualifications include "visited several countries," "attended the U of M for Acting and Ancient European History," and "[p]ursuing an MBA in Business Management, American History and a BS in Criminal Justice."

"Visited several countries?" the DNB hoots. "You've visited a ton of countries, maybe you should run for office!"

"Seriously, though, he has NO leadership experience to report?" I ask. "C'mon Adam J., weren't you at least a boy scout?"

"Surely he had a paper route?"

"Maybe someone dared him to run," I suggest.

But he has a website, and it's all very official looking, especially the photo of him reviewing what are Presumably Very Important Documents at his kitchen table, holding a pair of glasses he's not wearing in any other picture. He seems to share my love of excessive capitalization, which would be endearing if it weren't already so done right here.

"It's weird. He seems really unqualified," the DNB notes.

Which is why I'm writing in Adam J. for Vice President of the United States.

4 comments:

Kyle said...

God, Guns and Adam J.

Irene said...
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Irene said...
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Kyle said...

ooh was Adam J. leaving some nasty comments you had to delete??