Monday, June 30, 2008

The Mormons, Part I

There is a knock at the door!

Two elders from the Latter Day Saints stand optimistically in front of the house. I'm not about to convert, however I can't help but admire the devotion of Mormon missionaries. The elders tell me they are on their mission for two years, and during this time they speak with their parents just four times. They have $130 a month for food. I assume they are given no allowance for online shoe shopping, so I don't bother to ask.

They make small talk for a bit, and then I cut the chit-chat and get right to it.

"What's the deal with coffee?" I ask.

They laugh.

"No, seriously," I explain. "I read this blog called Dooce, and the author, a former Mormon, discusses how she had pre-marital sex at age 22, but 'BY GOD' she waited till 23 to have coffee."

They laugh again, more nervously. "It's recommended that we avoid coffee because, you know, it's not really good for you," explains one elder. "You can earn spiritual blessings by not drinking it."

"Got it," I reply. "Coffee and pre-marital sex: forbidden."

"Well one is harder to resist than the other," notes the other elder. "I don't even like coffee!"

1 comment:

Thaddeus said...

Haha! That's funny.

If you want a bit more context to their answer, try this out: What Do Mormons Believe?