It's snot funny

Want to hear something super gross?

So I've been sick for 10 million years. Raw nose, hacking cough, aching bones - sick. And as I'm blowing my nose for the thousandth time, I notice something wet near my eye. And I'm kind of disgusted because I'm expelling so much snot that it's filling up my tissue ALL THE WAY TO MY EYE.

I happen to be in front of a mirror, and I'm looking at myself as I blow again, trying to contain my snot to the lower mid section of my face, when I notice it.

Something is BUBBLING OUT OF MY EYE.

Like seriously, bubbling.

"Something clear just bubbled out of my eye when I blew my nose!!!" I screech at the DNB. I am beyond horrified. "That is so creepy! Wait . . . IS SNOT COMING OUT OF MY EYE??"

"Oh my god! Holy crap!" he replies, and for a minute I think he actually shares my panic. "You might be dying!" Guess not. "You're fine."

"I really don't need your attitude," I admonish him, "when my eye is busy snotting."

To prove my point, I make him look closely while I blow my nose again.

"Yeah, that's really super disgusting."