Sunday, January 20, 2008

Reason #876 Why it is Not as Helpful as One Would Think to be Married to a Doctor

My ear hurts tremendously. I'm achy, my throat is sore, and I can't sleep.

"Whoa," says the DNB as he jams an otoscope into my ear and takes a look. "Your ear looks totally gnarly."

I have no idea why he reverted to 90's Surfer Speak, but this, as it happens, is also a form of medical lingo which means, "You have an ear infection. Knowing this, I promise to be as loving and supportive as I can possible be during this difficult time."

"It hurts SO badly," I whine. "What can I take for it?"

"Nothing. Ear infections usually resolve on their own in a few days," he says cheerfully. "Have some Sprite."

It's his cure-all for the incurable.

"You are the WORST. DOCTOR. EVER." I announce as I pour myself a glass.

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