Monday, August 20, 2007

One of my greatest frustrations in life is, frankly, other people. Not all of them, just a fairly sizable number, which has recently increased since I attained Ikea Super Shopper status.

As an Ikea Super Shopper, I no longer linger, touching everything and moving nowhere. I no longer leave my cart in the middle of aisles, distracted by assembly-required pillows and shiny stainless shelves. I no longer consult the handy Ikea Map, designed to force less experienced shoppers to wander through the serpentine maze of particle board and synthetic textiles.

No, now the goal is Get In, Get Out, Don't Leave a Man Behind.

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