Thursday, August 2, 2007

I Need a Trapper Keeper for This

I think it's time.

I've taken the last name change gradually, which is how I needed it to be. The "Hello, Mrs. DNB" greetings immediately following our ceremony were too much, too soon. It had to be on my terms.

Those closest to me, although they may not understand why this was so difficult for me, at least know it has been. I started slowly, with the less important store mailers. Then the Pure Privilege Reward Card from Aveda and the phone bill. When I got my hair cut last weekend, I couldn't remember whether my appointment was under the DNB's name or mine, and I knew it had to be all or nothing. Now the major credit cards are done, and finally my checking account.

All that's left to do is to practice my signature, which feels very Infatuated Early Dating. Ms. John Doe.  Jane Doe.  Mrs. Jane Doe. 

Gag.

But my hand still writes my own name - twenty years of mine is difficult to overcome. So I need to practice, to train my hand to do what my heart is working to accomplish. To take on an identity that isn't yet mine.

No comments: