Monday, July 2, 2007

An Open Letter to the Two Girls Who Are Consistently Late to BarBri

Dear Ladies,

You two have been late every single day we've had class. That means, to date, my attention has been diverted from our lecture to your noisy asses walking in late TWENTY-SEVEN TIMES.

Seriously, you've been doing this commute for three years. You're smart girls, you graduated from law school, you know how long it takes you to make the drive. In case you're confused, though, I can let you know that it takes at least 30 minutes longer than you've been planning for.

Girls, when you're late, everyone else is already seated. Which means you have to climb over seats and backpacks to the middle of the row; your lunch bag, breakfast bag, computer bag (because God knows you can't be away from the internet long enough to pass the Bar), and giant purse nearly tipping drinks and smacking the heads of everyone you pass. Then, once at your seat, you have to get yourself situated, which always seems to involve setting up a three- or four-course meal of crunchy, involved foodstuffs.

And when you were both late to our practice test, with your usual vast productions of entries, I wanted to throw a Number 2 pencil at your collective heads. I wondered how much more rude can you be? And the answer is none. None more rude.

So get it in gear, show up on time, and stop being giant douchebags to the rest of us who are trying to learn this shit. And if you walk in late again, bearing a Starbucks cup, Row 5 is going to assault you, and when you wonder why they have an affirmative defense you didn't know about, don't ask to borrow. my. notes.



Kimberly said...

oooh ... I want to know who :)

-- K

Amber said...

They are whores. Not that that narrows it down much in the law school. I won't be sad if they die. I still maintain the doors should be locked at 9:01.